Lighten Your Load:Cleaning out your attic—and your mind
Allan Lokos tricycle
We’re going to look at one of the perfection
practices known as the paramis (see below). It’s the
practice of nekkhamma, which we translate as “renunciation” or
“relinquishing.” It means letting go: letting go of material things
as well as views, concepts, ideas to which we may have been
clinging for years, things that cause us stress, suffering,
dukkha.
A simple action that can be helpful in terms of relinquishing is
this: on a regular basis—perhaps once or twice a year— choose
something to give away. Not some old relic you don’t care about any
more, but something you do care about, that has value to you.
There’s no need to go overboard by giving away something that will
change your lifestyle or will make the kids resent you for the next
twenty years. Give away something you like yet are willing to
relinquish. During the entire process of selecting and
relinquishing, be mindful of your feelings. This can be more
challenging than it may at first appear, but it can help us prepare
for the day when we must relinquish all that we hold dear.
Now, what about views and concepts? Relinquishing is the ground for
practicing “beginner’s mind.” It helps us see things anew, as they
really are; to be willing to listen to the thoughts and ideas of
others with an open mind. So the relinquishing of thoughts and
ideas about which we have been adamant can give us a sense of
freedom, joy, and spaciousness. It can feel as if a weight has been
taken from our shoulders. However, this also may be easier said
than done. We might wonder, “Am I giving up something that I
should believe in?” So relinquishing offers an opportunity
to look more deeply at our beliefs.
Sometimes we have been holding onto anger or bitterness related to
a particular person or event. Something to think about is: What
would I have to give up in order to free myself from this
bitterness? We might think, “Well, yes, but what he or she did was
absolutely unforgivable.” Consider the possibility, and I
am only saying consider the possibility, that maybe nothing is
unforgivable. Maybe there is a way to find forgiveness even for
what we have believed for so long to be unforgivable. Explore this
mindfully.
To forgive does not necessarily mean to forget. Sometimes to forget
is not wise, but to forgive is wise. And it is at times not easy.
It can, in fact, be quite challenging. It will come as no surprise
that one of the most difficult people to forgive can be yourself.
Yet with patience and gentle determination, it can be done.
Parami (Pali), Paramita
(Sanskrit): literally, perfection, or crossing over (to the other
shore).
The paramis are practices that can lead one to the perfection of
certain virtuous or ennobling qualities. They are practiced as a
way of purifying karma and leading the practitioner on a path to
enlightenment. In the Theravada tradition, the ten paramis are
dana (generosity), sila (morality),
nekkhamma (relinquishing), panna (wisdom),
viriya (effort), khanti (patience),
sacca (truthfulness), adhitthana (determination),
metta (lovingkindness), upekkha (equanimity). In
the Mahayana there are six paramitas: generosity, morality,
patience, effort, concentration, and wisdom.
It is interesting to note that the parami of generosity comes
first, before the other practices, even morality. Some commentators
suggest that the list begins with the easiest practice and becomes
progressively more challenging. Another view is that until one sees
the interconnected nature of phenomena and has a heart open to the
needs of all beings, the other paramis can remain beyond reach.
With practice, the virtuous qualities become stronger and support
one another. Generosity supports relinquishing, which supports
morality, which supports truthfulness, which supports wisdom, which
supports equanimity, and so forth.
The paramis are seen as the heart of our true nature but greed,
hatred, and delusion cause them to become somewhat blurred.
Practicing the paramis is said to help us see in a different, more
beneficial way. His Holiness the Dalai Lama has said, “These deeds,
called the perfections, constitute the essential and comprehensive
path to enlightenment, combining method and wisdom.” Thus the
paramis are important practices for one who seeks to become an
awakened being and to end the cycle of samsara, or cyclic
existence. The key point to remember is that the paramis are
offered not as philosophy but as practices. To be effective,
practices need to be practiced.
Lighten Your Load:Cleaning out your attic—and your mind
Allan Lokos tricycle
We’re going to look at one of the perfection
practices known as the paramis (see below). It’s the
practice of nekkhamma, which we translate as “renunciation” or
“relinquishing.” It means letting go: letting go of material things
as well as views, concepts, ideas to which we may have been
clinging for years, things that cause us stress, suffering,
dukkha.
A simple action that can be helpful in terms of relinquishing is
this: on a regular basis—perhaps once or twice a year— choose
something to give away. Not some old relic you don’t care about any
more, but something you do care about, that has value to you.
There’s no need to go overboard by giving away something that will
change your lifestyle or will make the kids resent you for the next
twenty years. Give away something you like yet are willing to
relinquish. During the entire process of selecting and
relinquishing, be mindful of your feelings. This can be more
challenging than it may at first appear, but it can help us prepare
for the day when we must relinquish all that we hold dear.
Now, what about views and concepts? Relinquishing is the ground for
practicing “beginner’s mind.” It helps us see things anew, as they
really are; to be willing to listen to the thoughts and ideas of
others with an open mind. So the relinquishing of thoughts and
ideas about which we have been adamant can give us a sense of
freedom, joy, and spaciousness. It can feel as if a weight has been
taken from our shoulders. However, this also may be easier said
than done. We might wonder, “Am I giving up something that I
should believe in?” So relinquishing offers an opportunity
to look more deeply at our beliefs.
Sometimes we have been holding onto anger or bitterness related to
a particular person or event. Something to think about is: What
would I have to give up in order to free myself from this
bitterness? We might think, “Well, yes, but what he or she did was
absolutely unforgivable.” Consider the possibility, and I
am only saying consider the possibility, that maybe nothing is
unforgivable. Maybe there is a way to find forgiveness even for
what we have believed for so long to be unforgivable. Explore this
mindfully.
To forgive does not necessarily mean to forget. Sometimes to forget
is not wise, but to forgive is wise. And it is at times not easy.
It can, in fact, be quite challenging. It will come as no surprise
that one of the most difficult people to forgive can be yourself.
Yet with patience and gentle determination, it can be done.
Parami (Pali), Paramita
(Sanskrit): literally, perfection, or crossing over (to the other
shore).
The paramis are practices that can lead one to the perfection of
certain virtuous or ennobling qualities. They are practiced as a
way of purifying karma and leading the practitioner on a path to
enlightenment. In the Theravada tradition, the ten paramis are
dana (generosity), sila (morality),
nekkhamma (relinquishing), panna (wisdom),
viriya (effort), khanti (patience),
sacca (truthfulness), adhitthana (determination),
metta (lovingkindness), upekkha (equanimity). In
the Mahayana there are six paramitas: generosity, morality,
patience, effort, concentration, and wisdom.
It is interesting to note that the parami of generosity comes
first, before the other practices, even morality. Some commentators
suggest that the list begins with the easiest practice and becomes
progressively more challenging. Another view is that until one sees
the interconnected nature of phenomena and has a heart open to the
needs of all beings, the other paramis can remain beyond reach.
With practice, the virtuous qualities become stronger and support
one another. Generosity supports relinquishing, which supports
morality, which supports truthfulness, which supports wisdom, which
supports equanimity, and so forth.
The paramis are seen as the heart of our true nature but greed,
hatred, and delusion cause them to become somewhat blurred.
Practicing the paramis is said to help us see in a different, more
beneficial way. His Holiness the Dalai Lama has said, “These deeds,
called the perfections, constitute the essential and comprehensive
path to enlightenment, combining method and wisdom.” Thus the
paramis are important practices for one who seeks to become an
awakened being and to end the cycle of samsara, or cyclic
existence. The key point to remember is that the paramis are
offered not as philosophy but as practices. To be effective,
practices need to be practiced.
